To Kill a Mocking Bird

We used to have a tree outside the back of our flat. it provided some coverage to prevent our neighbours from looking in, but in truth we were glad to see the back of it, partly because it gave us a clear view of the sky, which is quite a luxury around here, but also because it removed a perch for the single most annoying bird ever.

Every morning, just at that point when you're slowly leaving deep sleep but aren't quite awake yet, I'd be startled awake by the sound of the doorbell being rung repeatedly. A grasp for clothes and a frantic dash downstairs would reveal... no-one there. And only then, as the sleep-addled brain was finally awake, would I realise it had been a bird outside tweeting in the style of a doorbell.

Honestly, it got me almost every Saturday for three years. Even after the tree was cut down, the routine meant that I rarely sleep in nowadays (helpful now that eBay has now resulted in a genuine wake-up call from the postman).

But this morning, that bastard bird got me again. One of the trees in next door's garden has grown sufficiently tall for the branches to be on a level with my window.

Tonight, we might well be having Starling Curry...